Nobel Prizes Galore

This goes out to all the infidels, the non-believers, and additionally to my soon-to-be technical followers.

Have you ever had a brillant idea which would get laughed at every time and by everybody when you presented it to the public?
I had.
So, one by one, over the next days and months I will try to give you an impression of my incredible creativity - of my ideas which, in a proper society in its right mind, would be heaped with Nobel Prizes.

Unfortunately, this society does not seem to be at hand. Therefore, feel free to laugh at me. But remember - wer zuletzt lacht, lacht am besten. Here are a few hints at the things to come:

• The Orbital Power Shovel


• The Assuan Cover


• The BioSolution To Climate Change, Desertification, Food, Water, And Energy Shortage, All Rolled Into One

(An Ode To) Modern Times

Do you remember last time when I told you about the enormously inefficient tree cutting activities in front of our offices, involving two (2) men, one (1) tree, one (1) chain and one (1) tractor?
Coming up is inofficial (amateur) footage of this incident, discreetly filmed by two civil servants:

• The Setup (Warning: heavy camera swaying, may lead to severe epileptic seizure including drooling and such)


• The Big Picture


• The Sound

(Okay, you cannot in fact see the tractor, but you hear it well enough.)

The East Renounces Crushing, Sources Say

The Western culture has been spared.

With all the Western history, its philosophy, its languages, its technology, its history, its political influence, everything - it can compete with Far Eastern, specifically Chinese culture. It all boils down to one simple statement:

"No, even if I could, I wouldn't single-handedly crush the West. I like the West with all this - but still, the noodle soup is just bad."

AC

Manners

"Du bist auch sonst ein ekelhafter Mensch."

"Mein Gott - Du abgespackter Loser!!"

"Hast Du in meiner Abwesenheit sogar das Rülpsen verlernt?"

Luckily, all this isn't happening in (my half of) my office. Therefore, I can listen to Tat Ming, the sentimental pseudopop band from Hong Kong's 80ies, and revel in my dumb neural net's hapless staggering through solution space in pursuit of matching weight vectors, usually missing them by 180 degrees. And Tunesian sun is shining at my back - through last trip's pictures I put up on the wall.

And on the other side of the office, there's still space. Some five times three square metres. What should I put up there? And should I ask MW first?

La Metamorfosis

What I found today... (a short excursion into the realm of worldly issues):

La Metamorfosis
"11.8.04
Deseo
Como me gustaría trabajar en una oficina donde pueda dar libertad a mis flatulencias sin necesidad de ir al baño...

Posted by: Ale / 15:10 0 comments"

The Quadrant Where No Bot Has Gone Before

Yesterday, I came to ask a colleague of mine a question about the workspace of our robot. Specifically, I wanted to know about a property of a single quadrant of its workspace, but allegedly, the current software doesn't know quadrants, but only strangely shaped regions of space - therefore, the discussion became one of hydrants.

Today, in one of my books there was a "solution polytope", but I've already read too much of the Heise forums for my own good, so this became a solution polyp.

Right after lunch, a few of the others were discussing different gravitational effects whether on the equator or on a pole. But, as MW pointed out, those can't be compared "because they lie in different climate zones".

WHAT COMES NEXT??

(to be continued...)

Ick hör dir!

"Google reduces share price and IPO volume" -
whereupon there has been a forum comment on heise.de with the subject "Nachtigall, ick hör dir trapsen". Which obviously ("opensightly") must be a quotation from some German classic. Being the dumb bloke I am, I wanted to find out its origin. So what? Try googling "ick hör dir trapsen". Some of the results:

Parsifal ick hör dir trapsen! ...

Euro-Abmahner, ick hör dir trapsen

Hartz IV, ick hör' dir trapsen. Ich weile seit 6 Uhr unter den Wachen und habe mir bereits aus reiner Faulheit ein bisschen Ärger aufgehalst. ...

Vorrunde, ick hör dir trapsen…

DEUTSCHLAND, ICK HÖR DIR TRAPSEN

Nazigall, ick hör dir trapsen. Muttertag in Berlin: Während in der Ankerklause am Landserkanal wie immer 400 Rechtsradikale über ...

Nachtigall, ick hör dir trapsen. Der Terminzettel meines neulich ausprobierten Zahnarztes ist doch tatsächlich überschrieben mit "Die fröhlichen Dritten ...

Sommerloch, ick hör' dir trapsen. ...

Stasi ick hör Dir trapsen. ...

Bluesrock, ick hör' dir trapsen.

Blockwart, ick hör Dir trapsen

SuperBowl ick hör Dir trapsen. Der Kampfschrei: Adrenalin statt Adolorin!

Werbung, ick hör' Dir trapsen.

Geigerlein, ick hör dir trapsen!

hoffnung, ick hör dir trapsen..;-)

Größenwahn, ick hör Dir trapsen... ;)

Wald- und Wiesenlesbe Gruppe: Members Beiträge: 5679 Userinnennummer: 129 Seit: 21.10.2002, Wahlkampf, ick hör' dir trapsen ....

Greifenstein-Bike-Marathon - ick hör Dir trapsen

Trashilein, ick hör dir trapsen... :rolleyes: :lol: ...

mauljucken?* *mein lieber herr gesangsverein.* *muss denn dit nu wieder sein?* *na, wie geht's uns denn so?* *nachtigall ick hör dir trapsen.* *ne karte oder ...

Ultimate und Extreme Edition, ick hör Dir trapsen ...

Rockstartum, ick hör´ dir trapsen.

Neues aus der Drogenpolitik. Datum: 01.07.2002 Kommentare zum Artikel. Wahligall, ick hör Dir trapsen!

Kategorie: schick schick, aber Akkulaufzeit ick hör' Dir trapsen. ...

Mannesmann, ick hör dir trapsen!

Windows ick hör Dir trapsen!

Tschernobyl, ick hör Dir trapsen - explodiert infolge von Überbeanspruchung. ...

Hochsommer, ick hör dir trapsen... ...

Retro, ick hör dir trapsen... Wirtschaftlich attraktive Geschäftsfelder werden natürlich nicht friedlich bewohnt wie ein Dorf im Allgäu. ...

(Raison d'Etre), ick hör Dir trapsen..!

Nun ja, Schlagerpop, ick hör dir trapsen.

turboprint 1.85 Windows ick hör Dir trapsen!

deinetwegen habe ich extra die morgensonnenbrüste (google, ick hör dir trapsen) mitaufgenommen. ...

Ben Johnson, ick hör' dir trapsen Dopingkontrollen sollten ...

Werbung ick hör' Dir trapsen... *roll*. ...

Susanne D., Ein Leben als Prostituierte :: GÜNSTIG :: Bücher ...
... von den Behörden anfänglich herumgeschubster Straßenhure. Klischee, ick hör Dir trapsen?? Nein, wohl eher ein Lebensmuster, wie ...

"Nachtigall, ick hör´Dir trapsen" könnten manche Sachbearbeiter bei den Versicherungen wohl sagen, wenn Sie fast zeitgleich zu ...

Und ich dacht schon "Altamon,... ick hör dir trapsen" aber es warn verkleidete Teddybären. Total nett. Naja und ...

... Praktikumsleiter zu verleumden. Nachtigall, ick hör dir trapsen. (Timo Rieg). Statistikpflicht für Tierversuche in der Lehre. Tierversuche in ...

Landesvorstandsmitglied Rainer Nachtigall: „Ick hör dir trapsen ...

RP, KStA, Express und andere webben zusammen. ==> Versum, ick hör Dir trapsen...! ...

Copland ick hör dir trapsen

Backlash, ick hör dir trapsen.

Streaming, ick hör dir trapsen. ...

The Mountie. Sperrung, ick hör dir trapsen! BLADE BLADING. Man werfe einen ...

Die Kinder müssen endlich zur Ruhe kommen." "Nachtigall ick hör dir trapsen." Zuerst das Jugendamt, dann die Pflege-/Adoptivfamilie. ...

Collector's Scum - ick hör dir trapsen. Bestellen könnt Ihr Hier

Idealismus – ick hör Dir trapsen! So fällt man ganz gemütlich hinter bereits erarbeitete Standards der Kritik zurück. ...

Ich liebe Sushi! Carla: Schön. Dann hat mich mein Gefühl ja nicht getäuscht. [foreshadowing, ick hör dir trapsen].

Kommt mir vor wie "MarlisM und die sorbischen Kopftuchträgerinnen". Nachtigall, ick hör Dir trapsen. ...

Jesus ick hör dir trapsen... Trotzdem 8 Punkte für dieses inspirierende Bild kurz vor dem Heiabettchen nach einem anstrengenden Tag.

NAchtigall ick hör dir trapsen :angel: mfg RaZorr. Jeremy Morton. Was willste denn damit sagen? Samurai. Was willste denn damit sagen? ...

Ist denn aber Mörike mit einer billigen Keyboardbegleitung besser, angemessener? Nachtigall, ick hör dir trapsen! ...

der EPD Film erzählt Chéreau, daß es nichts Schöneres gibt, "als die freiwillige Vereinigung zweier Körper" (Hype, ick hör dir trapsen!). ...

Aberglaube, ick hör Dir trapsen. Apropos Trapsen. Alle, die jetzt aus der dunklen Couchecke ...

autsch (Gast) (vor 1927 Tagen, 17 Stunden, 51 Minuten) nicht die häßlichste, weil sie in einem film nackt zu sehen ist? fettnapf, ick hör dir trapsen! ...

Semesterticket ick hör dir trapsen

Freitag 18 - Welcome, Polonia!
... heute deutsch. Dazu würde ein Berliner wohl nur den - unübersetzbaren - Satz sagen: Nachtigall, ick hör dir trapsen.

Software, ick hoer dir trapsen. Microsoft, ick hoer dir trampeln.

In "Endstation Hallstadt" (1996) geht es um einen Mann, der nach einem Attentat auf ihn in Bad Ischl (Sissi, ick hör Dir trapsen!), lieber sich selbst operiert ...

Jaja, Bakunin, ick hör dir trapsen...

performance in den keller geht? murphylein, ick hoer dir trapsen.

Saddam in da house!
... Irak, ick hör dir trapsen. Der Planet mit der Androiden-Falle - irakische Wüste. Das Gefecht mit den Freaks - Marines vs. Iraker. ...

Selbstreflexivität, ick’ hör dir trapsen...

Deutschpunk, ick hör’ dir trapsen? Schon, aber nicht die stumpfe Variante! Vielmehr sind Oma Hans ...

Doch dazu brauchen wir Führer und nicht Politiker. Ist schon klar, wir brauchen einen Führer! Nachtigall ick hör dir trapsen. ...

Heldenkult, ick hör dir trapsen. ...

Er prüft, ob es vielleicht gelingt - wenn er das Geld in's Ausland bringt - dem Fiskus etwas abzuknappsen: "Nachtigall, ick hör' Dir trapsen!" Frau O. mahnt ...

"Chinese Democracy" ick hör' dir trapsen..

(...)
This should be enough to give you the big picture.

And besides, today there's big action in front of our offices again. They are cutting down treelets again. A startling display of maximum energy usage vs. minimum effect - they use a tractor, knot a chain to it and thus pull out the bush. They already managed to extract a street sign from the soil on Friday. It seems now they are going for bigger fish :-).

"Yang hei gou fu Rock'n'Roll!"

I am completely astounded by the music clips played at Bayern 3. Only this weekend did I have a short rendez-vous with this station again, after a few weeks of abstinence, and what do I hear? The songs are new (to me), I don't know the names of the groups, but they do not *sound* new. Just today I came across a song sung by a completely unknown girlgroup which is based on a children's church song I know from many years ago. (Does anybody else know the favourite church tune of my childhood - "Stern von Bethlehem"?) How do music labels believe to be successful on the market with quick shots like that - providing a nobody with a melody known for eons and a song text which seems to be copied from some other girl star? Yesterday I briefly thought about buying new rear speakers for Smørebrød. But then, I think - what for?

Today, I've been on the Festspielhügel again to finally let my pressurized air plane fly for the first time this year. It's funny how people tend to stare at something they don't know, but quickly look away in a *Very* uninterested and bored fashion when this thing falls next to their feet and the owner comes to pick it up. Do they notice? Would I notice behaviour like that on myself?
Besides, I met some elder guy - or rather he met me - at this Festspielhügel, a short way uphill from the Festspielhaus. This guy wanted to know where the Festspielhaus is. (...) I mean, what place is this? He was standing right above it, he must have passed right next to it when coming up this hill, and still he didn't know where it is??

Today's title means "Shout together - Rock'n'Roll!" in Cantonese. I bet AC's going to kill me for this idiotic and debilitatingly incorrect transcription, but then... we all have our little monopolies, don't we? Anyway, the guy who sang that, the lead singer of an alledgly famous Cantopop band of the 80ies, fell from the stage somewhere in Japan during a rehearsal, into a gaping hole that suddenly opened up, and killed himself during (probably towards the end of) this action. I mean, why do the Japanese go for active stages? With moving floors and elevators and such? A wonder they don't lose more stars. Anyway, hearing this I was relieved we are in Western Germany... some months ago a friend of mine holding a scientific presentation in a medical robotics conference (I bet you know who's meant, don't you? For everybody else, here's a witness photo: ), when pointing a something at the projection screen, fell behind the stage. With a small scream. Everybody tried to look the other way, pretending not to have noticed... everybody except for MW and me, who had to bite our tongues very hard not to laugh out loud. But then this stage was only about fifty or something cm high.

Oh, and finally... would anybody have suspected there are critters as small as this one:

This almost-a-frog was so small (not larger than a fingernail) it might even have fit in here (between Smørebrød and a roadsign):

New Frontiers

Oh my goodness!

It's already late. Almost night. Well, it *is* night. What have I done? What *have* I done?

I have set up my blog. Yes. This blog. Today.
And I almost went to bed without having anything written! Maybe it would have been better like that, anyway, but now it's too late.
You watched it. You cannot unwatch it!

So I am sucking my thumb to find anything to write. Which is a funny connection, because my thumb hurts and needs to be sucked! Ha! Yes, I installed a hands-free mobile phone set in Smørebrød, which wasn't an easy thing to do, since all the cables needed to be hidden somewhere (yes, I belong to the old kinda people w/o Bluetooth and such) and there were almost no crevices to hide them in. Yes, it's a *real* car, and those don't have slits and slots... so I crammed the cable into places where no cable went before. And now my thumb hurts.

And I cleaned it. All my colleagues leech off my car... every day we go to the University's main mensa, and guess who's driving... Usually I wouldn't mind (okay, I don't mind), but then - just imagine. They complain. They verily and readily complain. And suckingly enough, they complain about the stench of the (hold your breath) - *FAKE LEATHER*! FAKE!! As if. Small fish, they are.

So. I try to upload this (if it doesn't work, it's all my friend AC's fault, and she knows it), and then I try for the fourth day in a row to hand in my tax statement for last year. I need to do this under Windows, since the program's for Windows, and I cannot do it at the office, since the firewall blocks. So I have to go home to send it, but I have to be at the office to print the confirmation. And once I change an entry in the statement, I have to repeat this all over. And I have to have all bills and such ready at hand. Go figure...

So - up unto new frontiers!